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My conspiracy theory is that Lindsey Graham is NOT dead, they're reporting this (1) to show that of *course* the Republicans would admit if a prominent senator died, and (2) so he can get extensive plastic surgery to look like McConnell and continue his legacy in the Senate for another 10-15 years.

Samuel Alito looks like an even-worse Mark Gatiss. Interestingly, he also has the personality and politics of an even-worse Mark Gatiss.

I haven't been on bsky in a month but am returning with a question that's been plaguing me since I awoke at 2 this morning. Are vampires killed by UV, or by THE SUN? In other words: could a vampire use a SAD lamp?

Today I biked past a sign proudly advertising a happy hour special: a PITCHER OF BEER for TWENTY HUMAN DOLLARS. I have a stable job with union protections & mandated COLAs, and my jaw is on the ground vis-a-vis price increases. I can't imagine being in a less privileged position. Fuck everything.

How much do you think you could sleep if there were no pressures on your time at all, including the societal virtue of productivity for productivity's sake? I think I'd average about 10 hours a night, probably more at first as I caught up.

You can schedule send TEXTS? I can pre-send good interview vibes to a friend NOW, when I'm thinking about it, instead of trying to remember in three days at 8am??? Is this... is this what makes me a thoughtful person people want to be friends with...?????

I audibly snorted and spat out a mouthful of rice at my desk, in public, when I looked at the art... lmaooo Lizzie Spriggs, fuck right off

Two hours left to bid on (or just get!) some customized pro-immigrant, anti-ICE bracelets! These are truly a steal and I just got some new beads that I'm super excited about: look how pretty 😍😍😍 Buy a pair: www.32auctions.com/organization... Bid on a kit: www.32auctions.com/organization...

Not to be a creep but uhh if you haven't read "Wisconsin is for Lovers," which prominently features a (different) toilet "museum".... today is a good day archiveofourown.org/works/43010661 (A lil tiny 2.7k, self-consciously E)

For months, possibly years, I've existed believing that Taika has done an adaptation of The Producers, but that's not true, is it?

Wow, turns out my tactic of "not dealing with the worst, scariest email of the week until 5:09pm on Friday" didn't propel me into the weekend with vim, vigor, and a sense of accomplishment, who could've seen that coming?!

Looking to spread the good word far and wide? May I suggest following my lead and sharing the link with your, uh [checks notes], therapist?

Definitely not mine, but this TealOranges cowl is so gorgeous and hasn't been bid on yet???? www.32auctions.com/organization...

Crochet Cowl - TealorangesAuction item 'Crochet Cowl - Tealoranges' hosted online at 32auctions.www.32auctions.com

ok this is still broadly true *but* in the 32 minutes since posting it I did realize I forgot my meds this morning. so uh PSA for all: if you feel extra on the edge of a psychotic break, check your pill minder.

😀I can't😀participate😀in paid labor😀 for😀a single second😀longer with😀out😀losing😀mygoddamnmotherfuckingeverlovingmind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pirate weekend capping off five weeks of sooooo much exhausting-but-overall-great travel was just THE BEST!! I am so tired and overstimulated but DELIGHTED 🏳️‍🌈🏴‍☠️💜💜💜 (special shout out to @yerbamansa.bsky.social for always being my pirate wingperson and keeping me from disappearing into the shadows)

I didn't get an RBB match and I'm sad about it which means you're actually legally required to bid on this so I don't feel like a fandom failure. Just think, you could be doing good on a macro scale for people in actual need **AND** for my needlessly fragile mental state.

Hi, come get my things! These are friendship bracelets featuring YOUR local immigrant resource/ICE-sighting hotline for easy reference. 1864: buy now pair, personalized in color (your fav pride flags?) and size 1865: bid on a kit for 10 bracelets, choose color vibes, includes everything you need!

Hey guess what. Sometimes when you have a hard conversation it's met with understanding and love, and even if someone is annoyed or even angry with you, it doesn't mean they hate you and the world is ending. WHO KNEW!!!!!!

I am 38 human years old. When am I going to learn that avoiding a difficult conversation/unpleasant situation doesn't make it go away; indeed, that it is almost certainly going to make it worse? This is so fucking obvious and yet!!!